I was going to add these to my "Christian Romance" post, but I thought they deserved a post all on their own.

This chick named Debra White Smith writes a series called "The Austen Series" and calls them "A modern christian adaptation of Jane Austen's classics." I call it plagerism. She ruins, butchers, and destroys her way through Jane Austen's works and calls it writing. The woman can't write! She has a series of six books now! Six books! And people are reading these things. This is a sick world we live in.

So here's what I'll do. First, I'll give the title, then the plot, and then one of the many five-star reviews that the readers on the cbd website give these books. After that, you'll have my opinion. This is not for people with weak stomachs. Try to guess the Jane Austen book that is the supposed "inspiration."

First Impressions
It's _____________ in London, Texas! Strong-willed young attorney Eddi Boswick is thrilled when she's cast as Elizabeth in the local theater's production of Jane Austen's classic. But sparks fly when computer-millionaire-turned-haughty-rancher Dave Davidson becomes leading man. Eddi's matchmaking mother tries setting the stage for love---but will independence and arrogance bring down the curtain?

Nicole says, "A must read for all Jane Austen fans."

Sarah says, "I wouldn't even roast marshmallows over this book. 'Computer-millionaire-turned-haughty-rancher Dave Davidson?' Give me a break. What kind of sissy name is Dave Davidson anyway? Are we supposed to equate that with Fitzwilliam Darcy? And why is an attorney and a millionaire acting in the local theatre? My first impression: Run for your lives!"

Reason and Romance
When Ted arrives, Elaina assumes he can't be interested in her. But Ted surprises her, and ElainElaina begins to dream about a future together. But them comes shocking news. Has she made a mistake? Elaina's sister, Anna, is delighted when her beau Willis hints at engagement. But when he is called away and doesn't leave a forwarding address, Anna falls into depression. Will she love again? A story about the joys and follies of infatuation and how faith in God reveals true love.

Debra says: As a high school literature teacher, Jane Austen fan, and avid Christian romance reader, I highly recommend Reason and Romance. Debra White Smith does a wonderful job of portraying the nuances of each character, staying true to Jane Austen. Please don't hesitate to read any of the Austen series. I also recommend the Sister series.

Sarah says: "One phrase to sum up how I feel about this book: 'His arms flailed, his eyes bugged.'"

Possibilities
Allie Ellen is the daughter of a respected, wealthy southern family who owns a plantation. Frederick Wently has no money and plans to join the Air Force. When the two meet, they feel a deep attraction. But Allie's unsentimental aunt dissuades her from the relationship so when Frederick proposes, Allie runs off.
Years later, Allie and Frederick find themselves in the same city once again. But other love interests and Frederick s bitterness from their earlier break up may keep them apart. Will forgiveness and hope erase the memories of the past in time for Allie and Frederick to have a future?

Sarah says, "Allie's unsentiment aunt dissuades her from the relationship and then 'Allie' runs away? Lame. Don't kid yourself, the book never had any possibilities. 'Tell me not that I am too late!' Perhaps I can yet save someone from the distress of reading this book. Unlike the Jane Austen book, don't expect this to 'pierce your soul.'"

In conclusion, these books suck. I don't typically use that word, but I think it is appropriate here.

Up next, (now that she has exhausted Jane Austen) Debra White Smith writes:
"Great Asperations: Young cowboy Kip falls in love with the lovely Ella but her wicked aunt drives them apart. Kip leaves the wild west and heads off to a Christian COllege with moeny from a mysterious person. Will Kip ever find out that the escaped convict (horse-thief) he helped when a child is really financing his asperations to attend a Christian College? Will he learn to forgive Ella before it is too late?"

And "He's my friend, too" : Young and spoiled Belle is engaged to be married to a man she doesn't know, the son of a rich Rancher. Unfortuantly, the elder Mr. Harris dies, and his son Joe Harris, on his way back from England, unexpectadly dies as well, leaving his ranch and entire fortune to the Boffits, the stable-hands who have lived in the shack behind the Harris plantation all these years. They take Belle in, and also hire a young man (Joe Smith) who is new to the country. He becomes their farmhand. He falls in love with the young lady, but she despises him and rejects his proposal because he is poor. When the Boffits throw Joe Smith out, will Belle realize that she loves him? What about Mr. Wrayfield and Liz Heckler and her brother Char and the murderous schoolteacher?

And, "The Ghost in the Theatre": Kristen has always dreamed of being a country singer, but she is haunted by the death of her father. Will young and handsome Ralph be able to save her from her "angel of music?"

And, "Misery": John ValJohn stole a loaf of bread to feed his sister's starving family and ended up in jail for 20 years. Will he ever escape from the Bounty Hunter, Javis? Can he help Fanny, a woman who works in the local saloon, and her daughter, Cathy? When Cathy grows up will she be able to love the local school teacher, Mark? And who will save Mark when he joins the local cattle-herders as they fight the rich and haughty thieving ranchers?"